


I'm Going to Tell You Today

by orphan_account



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Could Be Canon, Love Confessions, M/M, angst angst angst, canonical fake character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-04
Updated: 2014-01-04
Packaged: 2018-01-07 10:54:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1119027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John keeps planning to tell Sherlock something, but he keeps getting cut off by different things.<br/>Sorry I suck at summaries and titles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Going to Tell You Today

**Author's Note:**

> This is something I've had written for ages and of course I post it now after the Empty Hearse has already aired. Whatever, it still could hypothetically be canon.  
> Not beta'd or Brit-picked, any mistakes are my own.  
> You know how I love you all so much? You should write reviews. That would be cool of you.

I'm going to tell you today.

I've just realised it, and to be honest, it took me far too long.

Obvious, you'd say.

I really am going to tell you. I won't let fear hold me back. Really, I won't.

But what if you want me to leave?

I don't want to lose what we have.

* * *

I'm going to tell you today. I am. I'm not as scared as I was the first time.

I'm not. Really.

The words are on my lips as I walk into the room -- but then there she is. Standing there. And you're  _staring_ at her.

And there's some not very pleasant feeling in my chest.

Maybe not today.

* * *

I'm going to tell you today. 

Okay, the last two attempts didn't go as planned. But now we're on holiday (well, sort of) and we're together and there's no one to interrupt.

Except, apparently, you.

You tell me you don't have friends. And that hurts maybe even more than a rejection would have, because even if you'd rejected me, we would -- I thought -- still have been friends.

Apparently not.

* * *

I'm going to tell you today.

Even if you reject me, even if you kick me out, I have to tell you. I've kept this hidden for too long, until it physically hurts me.

So I'm going to tell you.

But then the call comes ( _she's dying_ ) and I have to go.

You stay.

I should have known then that something was wrong.

* * *

I'm going to tell you today.

I really am, this time. I've thought that so many times, but each time something stopped me.

Not this time. I'm not scared anymore -- I have nothing to lose -- there's no one around to interrupt or walk in on us, and I left my mobile back at the flat. No reason to have it with me when no one will be trying to contact me, is there?

I walk over to where you're resting and nod, once.

"I love you," I say quietly. That's all. Just those three words.

Then I lay the flowers down and walk away.


End file.
